The Call: Traffic Sign Truth — Jessica

“Metaphor is the lifeblood of all art, if it is not art itself. Metaphor is our vocabulary for connecting what we’re experiencing now with what we have experienced before. It’s not only how we express what we remember, it’s how we interpret it — for ourselves and others.” Twyla Tharp

Response: Coffee Spoon — Cheryl

…For I have known them all already, known them all: —
have known the evenings, mornings, afternoons,
I have measured out my life with coffee spoons; …
— T.S. Eliot, “The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock”

Photography and poetry are magnifying glass and lightbulb: one helps you find the details you look at everyday but never see; the other illuminates those dark corners you seldom venture into.

The Call: In the Corner — Cheryl

I equate penance with discipline, but I no longer equate discipline with punishment. My kids, I think, are thankful for that.

Discipline comes from the word “disciple,” which refers to a follower, not to an underling, a slave, or an inferior. My children are my disciples (I know that sounds narcissistic, but it’s not — having a baby was all I needed to learn the meaning of the word selfless), and that means I am their leader, or more accurately, their mentor. A mentor’s job is to teach, not to punish. The same goes for the Church established by Jesus more than 2,000 years ago. It exists to teach us, to show us the path we can follow to Heaven

Therefore, penance should be seen as a teaching tool, not a punishment. Catholic psychologist Gregory Popcak explains it well in Parenting with Grace:

The second most obvious lesson can be found in the Sacrament of Reconciliation. On the one hand Mom (the Church) has very high expectations for our behavior; on the other hand, when we fail, she is an extremely gentle disciplinarian. In fact, she never wastes time coming up with creative punishments. Taking her cue from the parable of the prodigal son, her entire discipline strategy consists of strengthening our relationship with the Father so that we will never want to leave home again. Remember, the whole point of those “five Hail Marys” penances is not to punish us (it would be a pretty stuipid punishment if it was). Rather, it is an invitation to spend some time seated in the lap of our Mother, before our Heavenly Father, who showers us with a love so profound that we cannot help but be made better by it. Catholic parents are called to do no less for our own children.

The Response: Washed Clean — Jessica

“Consequently the penance imposed in this sacrament [of reconciliation] is not a price one pays for pardon, for no human price could ever repair for even the slightest offense against a God of infinite holiness and majesty. Rather, the prescribed penance – when fulfilled – is offered to the Father by Our Savior, Who unites it with His own infinite satisfaction, thus giving the sacramental penance a special efficacy in remitting the temporal punishment due to sin.” — Fr. Paul A. Duffner, O.P.

The Call: Computer Team — Jessica

Teams form naturally in a large family. Certain kids will tend to hang together and (more comically) form alliances to get things that they want. Usually it’s the younger set versus the older set. Although that isn’t always the case. I’ve had the little kids come to me to argue the case that their older siblings deserve Monsters for having babysat them the previous evening. And with six siblings to choose from, teams are pretty fluid.

The teams that I appreciate the most are the big kid/ little kid ones. Because they help me out the most too. I can’t tell you how much time I spent battling Pokemon when my oldest got his first gameboy. Now that job goes to the next oldest kid. Just think about all the great skills the older ones are learning. At least that’s what I tell myself when I start to feel guilty. : )

Response: Practice for Adulthood — Cheryl

I have to agree with Jessica. The members of my family make a great team, each individual stepping up to the plate whenever necessary. It was even the case when our family consisted of only three or four individuals. Whenever I was at wit’s end with a toddler and needy baby, my husband had all the patience in the world. On the days when he needed space, I was more than happy to step in and see the game through to the end — so to speak.

I find the reaction of others to my large family rather amusing. When people learn I have six kids, they often exclaim, “You’ve got your hands full! I don’t know how you do it!” I generally smile and point out that it’s not terribly difficult since my kids aren’t all toddlers. The older ones are amazing with the younger ones: playing with them; feeding them lunch; reading them stories; keeping their eyes on them when we’re all out and about.

I’m very thankful that I play the game of Life on a big team and have come to realize that I like it much better than the individual events.

The Call: Messy Room — Cheryl

There are so many things I could write about the word “aggravating,” but I’m sure I’m not alone in this. The trick, I think, is being able to let it go. In fact, I’d have to say that letting the little things slide is how I manage to stay sane in my crowded, messy house full of kids and their accoutrements.

This is a picture of Sam and Jack’s room. I did nothing special to set up this shot. Their room is exactly as pictured. It changes on a day-to-day basis: more or fewer Legos on the floor or in the beds; books often piled on the dresser; clothes generally spilling out of the hamper in the closet. Today, though, I gathered up their lights and ran them through the washer. Before I showed up with my laundry basket, dirty clothes were strewn about the floor of the closet and hanging over the side of the hamper, but Jack’s shoes had been carefully placed, side-by-side on the floor, like a beacon of light amidst the chaos of a storm at sea.

The continual mess in the boys’ room does aggravate me, but that particular room also bothers me for other reasons. Four years ago, we had our house’s second floor removed and a new one built. This being our first major renovation, we made some poor design decisions (especially when the project came down to the wire and money was running short). Two of the worst decisions we made were: 1. building Bridget’s room too small to hold, with space for anything else, that gorgeous queen-size bed that Sam now sleeps in and 2. putting the closet right there, where you see it. It makes it impossible to fit two twin beds in side by side, and any attempts to switch or re-arrange furniture prove just about fruitless, leaving me feeling very aggravated indeed.

The Response: Red, Red Wine — Jessica

The cure for aggravating days…well not really. But yes, sometimes!

The Call: Homemade Tomato — Jessica

It may not be very pretty but it’s special because it came from my garden. Or rather my corner of my friend’s garden. She let me plant a few tomato plants in a section of her plot at the community garden. And now, a few weeks later, I’ve got real, delicious, red tomatoes.

They may have a shape that only a mother could love, but this mother is so proud of them!

Response: The Kitchen Table — Cheryl

This metal-topped oak table, along with four oak chairs, was the “breakfast set” my mother bought at the furniture store she worked at before she got married. We just called it “the kitchen table,” though. It has held  millions of meals and dozens of birthday cakes; thousands of loaves of bread have been kneaded on it; and innumerable hands of Cribbage have been dealt upon it. For the past year or so, it has served as my desk. Soon, it will be moved to the living room, where it is sure to host board games and art lessons. In the future, it may serve in another capacity, but it will be here — if I have anything to say about it.

The Call: Moving Parts — Cheryl

When I think of the adage, “Curiosity killed the cat,” I don’t often think it applies to me. “Caution saved the mouse” would be a better motto in my case. But that doesn’t mean I’m not curious. It’s just that my curiosity manifests itself in ways that are generally mundane. If an analytical nature can be said to be a curious nature, then put a check mark next to my name.

I like to think that I have few control issues: most have been scraped away by 16 years of parenthood and decades of growing in faith. I can usually handle what life throws my way, with one caveat: I need to understand how I got to the point I’m at. That is the analysis/curiosity part and it sometimes threatens to drive me crazy. If I have a headache, I want to know exactly what triggered it. An anxiety attack can’t simply be the result of stress; there has to be more to it than that. If someone compliments me, criticizes me, or just says, “Hello,” I wonder what I did to deserve the attention.

It’s not all bad. My curiosity has filled my life with books, has led me to homeschool my kids, and keeps me exploring creatively.

The Respones: Assorted Weirdness — Jessica

Why are the sausage biscuits at the bottom of the stairs? Why is there a teaspoon at the front door? In my house I’ve learned the answer is usually because of the two-year old. And after living with two-year olds for over fifteen years, well, let’s just say that we have a whole lot of war stories. Plenty of ammunition for wedding toasts too!

But I have to say, even after all these years, our curiosity isn’t diminished. We still ask why. Unfortunately the answer isn’t all that satisfying and typically leaves us shaking our heads.

The Call: Baptismal Font at St. Catherine’s, Great Falls, Virginia — Jessica

O God,
protector of those who hope in you,
without whom nothing has firm foundation, nothing is holy,
bestow in abundance your mercy upon us and grant that,
with you as our ruler and guide, we may use the good things that pass
in such a way as to hold fast even now to those that ever endure.
Through our Lord Jesus Christ, your Son,
who lives and reigns with you in the unity of the Holy Spirit,
one God, for ever and ever.
Amen

Response: Father and Daughter — Cheryl

The family is the foundation of society; it’s a microcosm of the world outside. A family should provide a safe, loving environment in which children are free to learn, to make mistakes, to love, to socialize, to try out new words and new ideas. A positive upbringing in a home where children are protected and respected should be the first — the firmest — foundation for every single human being.

In The Role of the Christian Family in the Modern World, the late Pope John Paul II tells us: “According to the plan of God, marriage is the foundation of the wider community of the family, since the very institution of marriage and conjugal love are ordained to the procreation and education of children, in whom they find their crowning.”

Meg Meeker, M.D., in her book, Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters, acknowledges the importance of a firm foundation in a stable family, but narrows her focus: “I have not chosen attributes of fathers to discuss randomly. I have watched and listened to your daughters for many years and have heard what they say about you [fathers]. I have talked to countless fathers. I have treated daughters and counseled families. I have read psychiatry texts, research papers, psychology journals, religious studies, and pediatric journals. Doing this has been my job. But I will tell you that no research paper, no textbook diagnosis, no instructions can begin to change a young girl’s life as dramatically as even a handful of interactions with her father. Nothing.”

I am thankful that my husband is providing a firm foundation for my daughters (and sons).

The Call: Still Life with Chocolate — Cheryl

What is essential to life? Looking at the question academically turns up some obvious, but mundane, answers: water, proteins, air, shelter, food. My list of essentials goes beyond the basics. The books were the first items I collected for this still life, as I can’t imagine life without them, and frankly, get rather depressed when I enter a house and find fewer than two dozen or so volumes. I could live without the coffee and the tea and the chocolate, but I don’t want to. Those particular items are important to me more for what they represent than for what they are: a little time to myself, often spent writing. The flowers symbolize beauty; the bib, the ones I love; and the Rosary speaks of God and faith.

“… Sweet fire the sire of muse, my soul needs this; / I want the one rapture of an inspiration. / O then if in my lagging lines you miss …”
— Gerard Manley Hopkins, “To R.B.”

The Response: Sunset Over the Loundoun Valley or the Road Home from Camp — Jessica

When I began teaching, many years ago, Texas had just passed a curriculum reform package that required teachers to tie all lesson plans to a detailed list of “essential elements” developed by educational experts. These many years later, when I hear the word “essential,” I still immediately think of “elements.”

But then what a good question: What are the essential elements of photography? Light, of course. But also shadow, without which the light would have no dimension. And vision. Without which you cannot tell a story.

Light, shadow and vision. The rest is all details.

The Call: The Bond of Brothers — Jessica

I’ve recently picked up a few books on creativity that have been both insightful and trite. But Twyla Tharp’s The Creative Habit is non-stop, mind-blowing a-ha moments. Every page, every chapter is full of beautiful little moments of truth such as: “Metaphor is the lifeblood of all art….If all art is metaphor, then all art begins with memory. The ancient Greeks knew this: in their origin myths, they cite Mnemosyne, the goddess of memory, as the mother of the Nine Muses.”

Response: Birthday Girl — Cheryl

Bridget turns 14 today. She’s my second child, and the loveliest young lady I know. As a baby, she was so difficult, she made her older brother seem easy-going, and he was anything-but. Bridget has been dealt more than her fair share of adversity, but I’m constantly amazed by how gracefully she rises above it all. Obviously, I’ll always remember when we almost lost her, at age ten, to Diabetic Ketoacidosis, but that’s just because it’s the most dramatic memory she has created thus far. On a regular basis, she pours into my mind images of fun, laughter, sweetness, thoughtfulness, creativity and love for all those around her (even her older brother), and I’ll hold onto those tightly.

…Memory! / You have the key, / The little lamp spreads a ring on the stair. / Mount. / The bed is open; the tooth-brush hangs on the wall, / Put your shoes at the door, sleep, prepare for life.” …
— T.S. Eliot, “Rhapsody on a Windy Night”

Call: Primary Color Density — Cheryl

Call & Response: the big experiment. Jessica was able to shoot a photo each day for 365 consecutive days. I was able to shoot a photo each day for 365 consecutive days. Can we do it together, thousands of miles away from each other, inspired by the same one-word prompt?

Know where I got the inspiration/instructions for this science experiment on the density of liquids? From the book (that I bought probably 12 years ago, after deciding to homeschool), 365 Science Projects and Activities. How many projects and activities? Yep. 365.

A quote I came across today: “In wisdom gathered over time I have found that every experience is a form of exploration.” The sentiment is from photographer extraordinaire Ansel Adams. I could substitute the word “experiment” for “exploration,” and it would pretty well sum up what I’ve discovered. The kids and I don’t do many formal experiments (the kind found in 365 Science Projects), because everything we do is an experiment: What if we substitue gluten-free flour in this recipe? If I move over here, will the light on that flower pop in my photo? I think I’ll try using Coke in a marinade for steak. If we offer to put a jigsaw puzzle together with Stella, will she quit bugging Jack?

Response: What if? — Jessica

Like Cheryl, I’ve come to believe that “what if” is the most important question that you can ask — especially if you want to be creative. If you stop experimenting and wondering you lose your curiosity. When curiosity is no longer driving your life you tend to fall into a rut. You do the same things over and over.

I love to ask myself “what if” when I’m taking pictures. I’m slowly working through a lot of the tutorials on David Hobby’s site The Strobist. This picture is a perfect example of one of those experiments. It may not be a perfect picture but it leads me to ask “what if”. As in, what if I move the flash away from his head, will that reduce the hot spot? What if I stop down a bit ? Will that help?

Experiments are grand fun even (and sometimes especially) when they go all wrong. So, Cheryl, let’s raise our glasses to messy experiments!